Advice

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I'm Just Looking for Something Casual, Can I Say So In My Profile?

By Emma Siemasko

I've been noticing a trend on OkCupid, and it's happening to me and my lady friends. A lot of guys are telling us we're pretty and soliciting us for sex. They're filling their profiles with physical characteristics they're looking for: I love blondes, I'm a boob guy, I'm looking for someone beautiful. Boys, we don't like it at all.

It's OK To Be Casual

It's not that all of us are surfing the 'net to find the love of our lives so we can settle down and have 1.5 children, but compliments about our physical appearance and direct questions about sexual preferences turn us off, even if we're using OkCupid to find a satisfying physical connection. Girls know they are attractive- they are not impressed or flattered when you tell them. We want you to tell us what you see in us, something that isn't physical.

Girls like sex, too. We're not opposed to casual flings, but we'll only agree if you go about it in the right way. Women want to feel safe, no matter the situation. No girl likes to feel like an object, like someone who is used. Make us feel special, treat us with respect, and you might find a little love alongside the pleasure you're seeking.

In the last three days, I've received a ton of messages on OkCupid telling me that I'm pretty. I DON'T CARE, BOYS. How about you ask me about something I wrote in my profile?

Real Messages From Guys on OkCupid

hi how are you doing? you are gorgeous

Hey there I'm Jack. So why are you on here?? You dont need a dating site, you are absolutely beautiful. I wanna try to make you laugh haha, so heres a joke haha. [Insert very long joke.]

You are absolutely beautiful wow I would love to chat some time and get to know you

Are you always this hot?

You have beautiful hair!

wow you're one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen...

hey, cute pic :) that may sound strange and crazy, but I'll ask... Are u interested in having a cam slave? I'd do anything u want me to do!!! Pain, humiliation, ...... sry if I offended u by writing that message :(

Guys, it's okay to use sites like OkCupid for casual encounters, but be appropriate and considerate when creating profiles and sending messages. If you need help making a profile that gets results, or want some pointers in tailoring messages to reach the girls you want to hang out with, come talk to me. I promise I'll help you, whether you're looking for a one night stand or a wife.